Tanner Kalina begins his story by sharing how, although he grew up with faith in Texas, baseball always took priority over God. He pursued his dream of making it to the major leagues with single-minded dedication, and early success seemed to confirm his path—until he was bullied in college and developed 'The Yips,' a psychological condition that shattered his performance and left him deeply depressed. To cope, he turned to comedy, eventually developing a passion for performance that replaced his athletic dreams. His new obsession became joining the cast of Saturday Night Live, and he began working tirelessly in the entertainment world.
Kalina eventually booked a major film role, which opened doors in Hollywood, including representation from a top agent. But the lifestyle he entered into was deeply conflicted with his values. Despite knowing the film wasn't in line with his beliefs, he couldn’t say no to the opportunity. As his success grew, so did a feeling of emptiness and disconnection. A critical moment came when someone was surprised to learn he was a Christian, revealing to Kalina how compartmentalized and fractured his life had become. He was trying to keep faith and ambition separate—an internal split that left him feeling lost and restless.
This restlessness culminated in a terrifying experience while surfing alone, where he was nearly drowned by powerful waves. In that moment of helplessness, Kalina realized he had been treating his faith like he treated surfing—half-hearted, non-committal, and dangerously casual. This moment served as a turning point, prompting him to go to confession, reorient his life, and surround himself with people who truly lived their faith. He moved into a modest house with devout Christian men who inspired him to read Scripture and pray daily. As he deepened his relationship with Jesus, his desires and habits began to change, and the faith he once saw as limiting became a source of freedom and joy.
In the end, Kalina emphasizes that nothing in the world—not fame, success, or pleasure—can fulfill the deep longings of the human heart like an intimate relationship with Christ. He urges listeners not to wait or live split lives but to take a bold leap into wholehearted faith. His journey is a testimony to the emptiness of worldly pursuits without God and the healing, clarity, and joy that come from giving one’s whole heart to Christ. He concludes with encouragement to pursue this kind of relationship, reminding us all that we are made for more—and we deserve the fullness that only God can give.
Journal and reflect on the following
What dreams or goals have you pursued that, in hindsight, left you feeling unfulfilled or restless?
Have you ever felt like you were living a “split life” between your faith and your everyday choices? What did that look like?
When have you recognized that something you thought would satisfy you actually left you feeling empty?
Is there an area in your life where you’re afraid to go “all in” with God? What’s holding you back?
Who in your life helps you grow in faith and holds you accountable to your spiritual journey?
How might daily habits like prayer, Scripture, and community help reshape your heart and desires like they did for Tanner?
What would it look like for you to take a bold leap of faith in your life right now? What is God inviting you into?
Discuss
Song - Restless
Final Prayer
Lord Jesus, you are the only one who truly satisfies the deep longings of our hearts. So often we chase after success, approval, or comfort, only to find ourselves empty and divided within. Thank you for never giving up on us, even when we run or forget who we are. Help us to stop living half-heartedly and to take a bold leap toward you with trust and surrender. Ignite in us a desire for a real, living relationship with you—a love that transforms, heals, and sets us free. May we choose you daily, knowing that in you, we find our true purpose, joy, and peace. Amen.
